It’s been about a month since I gave you all a life update, so I’m doing another one. I know that in my update at the beginning of September, I said that August had been a wild month, but September was even more insane *in a good way*.
I was born backwards; I was breech. I’ve often wondered at the significance of that. I was breech, my mom was born breech. Not only does it reach back up into previous generations, but also I had a dream last week that I was heavily pregnant, and that my baby was breech. I felt God saying in that moment, “You have been set apart, a peculiar people, from the very beginning of your life. Now I am birthing a new thing in you, and when it comes, people will say it’s all backwards and odd. But what others call crazy, backwards, and scary, I call set apart and chosen. Do not be afraid of appearing backwards to the world, as long as you have set your eyes forward on Me.”
“God’s ways are different from our ways.” Have you ever heard that phrase? The more I pursue God’s ways, the more true I find it to be. There are so many unusually bold moments I’ve had, where words pour out of my mouth and I know they came straight from the heart of God. So many times I’ve “just got a feeling” that someone is struggling and when I ask them how they are, I can see in their eyes if they’re lying when they say they’re “fine”.
Have you had those moments of courage too? Does God ever tell you to go and pray for the broken-down car on the side of the road and offer them all the snacks and assistance you have to offer? Does He tell you to talk to the rough and tough guys coming from the streets and tell them how loved they are, how completely and utterly adored they are by their Father? Does He tell you to stand up and share your story to hundreds of people, or to just thirty kids who need to know it’s okay to struggle, that they’re not alone? Has He ever reminded you that He’s called you out of where you are and into the purposes and plans He has for you?
He’s been doing that to me lately. And the longer I delay my obedience, the less courage I have. I don’t want to mess up the rhythm of the movement of God by my hesitation to do what He says. I want to go where He calls me, speak what He speaks to me, and love with the love He’s shown me. It may seem backwards, crazy, or ridiculous, but I have full confidence that He who called me is faithful to bring His works through me to completion. Even if it looks like it’s coming out backwards.