Honestly I’m not even sure why I say “raw” in the title every time I do one of these updates, because they’re always from the deepest places of my heart. Maybe just for the sake of new followers or to pull in your attention. Anyway, I’ll stop the rambling intro here and get into the rambling update.
I’ve been stuck on these verses all month because they’ve been making so. much. sense. I understand why I feel crazy—because people who don’t see, don’t see. People who don’t understand, don’t understand. And I’ve been expecting them to because I do. I’ve been asking God to do a new thing in my life, something unheard of by people, something miraculous. And He has, and I’ve been silly enough to get discouraged that it’s not happening to other people when I literally asked for unheard of things. Of course no one’s gonna get it.
“This is why the Scriptures say: Things never discovered or heard of before, things beyond our ability to imagine— these are the many things God has in store for all his lovers. But God now unveils these profound realities to us by the Spirit. Yes, he has revealed to us his inmost heart and deepest mysteries through the Holy Spirit, who constantly explores all things. After all, who can really see into a person’s heart and know his hidden impulses except for that person’s spirit? So it is with God. His thoughts and secrets are only fully understood by his Spirit, the Spirit of God. For we did not receive the spirit of this world system but the Spirit of God, so that we might come to understand and experience all that grace has lavished upon us. And we articulate these realities with the words imparted to us by the Spirit and not with the words taught by human wisdom. We join together Spirit-revealed truths with Spirit-revealed words. Someone living on an entirely human level rejects the revelations of God’s Spirit, for they make no sense to him. He can’t understand the revelations of the Spirit because they are only discovered by the illumination of the Spirit. Those who live in the Spirit are able to carefully evaluate all things, and they are subject to the scrutiny of no one but God. For Who has ever intimately known the mind of the Lord Yahweh well enough to become his counselor? Christ has, and we possess Christ’s perceptions.”
I can’t even begin to describe the roller coaster this year has been for me so far. I started it out expectant, got discouraged, got really encouraged, got sucker punched so hard, and heard of a sweet friend’s passing. I’ve lost friends I didn’t expect to lose and gained old ones I didn’t expect to regain.
But you know what? Through it all—reconnecting with old friends, being betrayed, used, and violated by a friend I trusted, and having some hard, some odd, and some grace-filled conversations—through it all, my character has grown and my belief in the goodness of God is even stronger. He is so kind. So tender. He tells me secrets, of things no one else knows, and prepares me and my heart for the upcoming trials and joys.
My word for 2019 has been “harvest”, and my word at the end of this week is “joy”. Joy for mourning. Beauty for ashes. Hope in brokenness. He is worthy of it all. All of the glory, all of the glory, is His. It’s a touch of Heaven.
I’m leaving this week heavy, but also heavy with hope. Heavy with the weight of what God is doing. Heavy with the awe that He has gone before me and He is defending my heart.
Like the content you see and want to support me? The best ways to do so are to share my blog with your friends and to Buy me a coffee. Thanks for your support!